May 30, 2009

Remembering

9/21/63 – 5/30/06

Robbie

Three years ago today changed our lives forever. The Lord took you home to be with Him. I miss you so much. I dreamt of you the other day and it was great to see your face! I heard your laughter and precious memories of you came rushing through my mind. As I awoke, I noticed my heart was pounding and I lost my breath when I remembered it was all just a dream, and that you really aren’t here anymore. Then I heard a small voice from within and God reminded me that death will not have the last say, because of His saving grace, you will see your brother again some day! Robbie, I’m looking up to heaven to you today.



My heart was crushed with grief. My brother was tragically killed in a train accident. My mind spun uncontrollably. I could not focus on a logical thought. Nightmares kept me from sleeping. During the day, I could barely stay awake. I was so crushed with grief. I wanted to shut out the world. I wanted to die. BUT I knew it was against all I knew the Lord had taught me. I cried out to Him for relief. He met me where I was. He comforted me as I gave each hurt of my soul to Him. . I praise Him for lifting my spirit of heaviness. I Praise Him for using my heartaches and grief to teach me wisdom, empathy, and compassion. He has given me strength.

Lord,

How could I ever possibly be prepared for something like this? It all seems so final. No more chances to share our feelings and retrieve the time, to do and say the things undone. My heartaches. Yet at the same time, I feel Your comforting presence near.

How I praise You for comfort and strength in my time of grief. Little by little, layer by layer , You are healing my heart and soul. I praise You for surrounding me with Your warm, constant presence that helps fill the void within me. Thank you Lord, for reminding me in Your Word about life everlasting, because I know my dear one, loved You, all isn't final. There is life beyond death where no sadness or pain exists, a life that lasts forever. Someday You will wipe away all my tears.

Even though I have tears and heartache now, I thank You for Your promise that JOY WILL COME IN THE MORNING.

I realize, You are showing me it isn't my loved one I'm weeping for. It's me. Thank you God for Your comfort. I look forward to joining You in heaven someday and being with my brother once again. In the meantime, I know I have more to do for You here, Lord, so I will keep going on. I will serve you and praise You with all my heart.

4 comments:

Laura said...

I'm so sorry - sending hugs your way.

Carey said...

Praying for you today my friend.

Deb said...

(((HUGS)))and prayers.

Andrea said...

If you only knew how you just touched my heart. In exactly 25 minutes my sister will have been gone 1 week. We weren't the closest of sisters but how I wish we would have been. She was taken so suddenly but I did get to talk to her while she was in a coma and I just know she heard me. God bless you and know that my sister rests peacefully with your brother.
Blessings,
Andrea