May 30, 2008

Remembering My Brother Who Was Killed

9/21/63 – 5/30/06

Robbie

Two years ago today changed our lives forever. The Lord took you home to be with Him. I miss you so much. I dreamt of you the other day and it was great to see your face! I heard your laughter and precious memories of you came rushing through my mind. As I awoke, I noticed my heart was pounding and I lost my breath when I remembered it was all just a dream, and that you really aren’t here anymore. Then I heard a small voice from within and God reminded me that death will not have the last say, because of His saving grace, you will see your brother again some day! Robbie, I’m looking up to heaven to you today.

I Love you and miss you deeply. You will live on in my heart.


My heart was crushed with grief. My brother was tragically killed in a train accident. My mind spun uncontrollably. I could not focus on a logical thought. Nightmares kept me from sleeping. During the day, I could barely stay awake. I was so crushed with grief. I wanted to shut out the world. I wanted to die. BUT I knew it was against all I knew the Lord had taught me. I cried out to Him for relief. He met me where I was. He comforted me as I gave each hurt of my soul to Him. . I praise Him for lifting my spirit of heaviness. I Praise Him for using my heartaches and grief to teach me wisdom, empathy, and compassion. He has given me strength.

Lord,

How could I ever possibly be prepared for something like this? It all seems so final. No more chances to share our feelings and retrieve the time, to do and say the things undone. My heartaches. Yet at the same time, I feel Your comforting presence near.

How I praise You for comfort and strength in my time of grief. Little by little, layer by layer , You are healing my heart and soul. I praise You for surrounding me with Your warm, constant presence that helps fill the void within me. Thank you Lord, for reminding me in Your Word about life everlasting, because I know my dear one, loved You, all isn't final. There is life beyond death where no sadness or pain exists, a life that lasts forever. Someday You will wipe away all my tears.

Even though I have tears and heartache now, I thank You for Your promise that JOY WILL COME IN THE MORNING.

I realize, You are showing me it isn't my loved one I'm weeping for. It's me. Thank you God for Your comfort. I look forward to joining You in heaven someday and being with my brother once again. In the meantime, I know I have more to do for You here, Lord, so I will keep going on. I will serve you and praise You with all my heart.

I am humbled....your servant.

12 comments:

Jennifer said...

Praying for you today!

Mar said...

Robbie's life continues because you loved him--because you pass the best of him on to us with your memories. Keep loving and sharing. It brings us all together.

ComfyDenim said...

What a sweet tribute to your brother and to your God. :-)

((((((Hugs)))))

gina said...

My prayers are with you. What a beautiful tribute.

Halfmoon Girl said...

I echo all the sentiments of your other commentors- this is a beautiful tribute to your brother. This must be a tough day- you'll be in my prayers.

SharonB said...

What a precious post. Grief is never easy...may God be with you in a mighty way today as you remember your brother.

casual friday everyday said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine the pain of losing someone you love so suddenly.

Denise said...

I have not lost a brother or sister but even the thought hurts my heart... I do not know what you are feeling but I do know that your faith will heal the grief and the tears will dry and a smile will replace the grief..... and what JOY you will have when we are reunited with those that have gone on before........

Deb said...

(((((HUG)))))
love.
Deb

A Stone Gatherer said...

We are forever changed when a loved one goes before us! We do cry for us, because we know we could never ask them to leave the Lord's side, but we sure wish they could still be here! You are in my thoughts and prayers!

Kari & Kijsa said...

What a wonderful tribute to a life well-lived!

Have a blessed weekend!

smiles, kari & kijsa

Cakes said...

lots of hugs and lots of prayers