April 6, 2008

I want to know what you think

How would you take this statement?

"When a couple is not blessed with a child naturally/biologically they are forced to adopt?

13 comments:

Mel's World said...

I guess it would have to be considered in HOW it was said...there is so much that goes into a sentence beyond words, mannerisms, inflection, tone, body language...BUT, my first impression is that it might come across a little harsh. But again, it truly depends on the context and whom said it. (Did any of that make sense?)

If it was a great friend and we were having a great in depth conversation I might be like, oh, ok, I see your point...

If it were in a conversation with someone who was childless but desperately wanting a child I would think OUCH, a little harsh...

If it was a statement about adoption then it carries another whole meaning...

I guess it would really hinge on all the details surrounding the sentence...

Melissa

Halfmoon Girl said...

I would have to agree with Melissa. It is hard to comment without more context. Though there are some who may only adopt as a last resort, I would hope that most who adopt do it because they have a heart for it.

A Stone Gatherer said...

My first impression was wow harsh! Hurtful! But I guess I'm with Melissa too! Never take anything out of context!

gina said...

I've read the above comments and have to go with my first impression:

I'm not sure there is a context in which "forced to" could be something taken as anything but negative.
That said- I think we will always encounter ignorance and rudeness in life and may we have the grace to rise above it and give the negative person something to think about(they may not have realized how callous/rude the comment was) and aspire to(if they did or didn't).

Deb said...

I guess if they feel they are FORCED to adopt then hmm should they?? If they cannot have a child and really want one and their heart is ok with adoption well? YES. This all depends on their hearts. There needs to be more here to get the picture.
Deb

Flip Flop Floozie said...

No one should be FORCED to do anything. That is why God gave us choices...WE choose!! Adoption is a great thing to do of course. So many children need good homes!! But Forced..No!! I hope this helps..at least it is the way i think..Sandy

PamperingBeki said...

Hm. I don't think they're forced to do anything!

Becky in East Tennessee said...

I agree with all above. No one is FORCED to do anything unless they are held captive or something. But I do agree. That as a last result they may have been forced to take other routes. Interesting question.

(PS--hey Giggles, visit my blog today, I have a gift for you)

nell@casualfridayeveryday said...

Why aren't you blessed to adopt a child? I actually think adoption is a blessing. A huge blessing...for the child and the parent. It isn't easy to adopt and when it happens it is a blessing.

Rhonda said...

I agree with Mel. It's really difficult to answer without all of the background.

My first thought is that no one is forced to adopt. Adoption is a choice. Whether the couple has natural-birthed children or not.
Adoption is an opportunity to love and nurture children that would not otherwise be a part of a family.

The child is blessed by being chosen by a family. And the family is blessed by giving of themselves and spreading their love to the child.

Denise said...

I think that the word forced is so harsh and makes me wonder that the person that made the statement does not understand the emptiness that is in the hearts of loving caring people that desire a child..... It is a heart condition and a heart choice for a child... whether God gives us that child naturally or by the way of adoption...... both are from God...

Sue Cramer said...

*gasp*
It kind of took my breath away was my first response.

I consider adoption such a gift and I am so thankful that we opened our heart to it.

I have issues with the word "forced."

I guess I would not want to be the child of a parent that was forced to adopt me. I would rather be a choice which is what I think adoption is.

The irony is that it's more accurate to think of pregancy as forcing you into parenthood! :)

Bella Boutique Creations said...

I just read your post, and the comments, I can agree with many of the comments. I think the word forced is a bag choice of words as "forced" is negative sounding, because of its meaning, something that is done without will. What I think is more appropriate, and ultimately more meaningful is COMPELLED. Though to some it may mean the same thing, for someone that has the desire to be a parent, YES, in the sense of the definition, you are forced to adopt, because of the compelling need and desire. It really is just a matter of using the right words.

In a nutshell it all depends on who is saying it and to who it is being said.